Unicorn Blood
by ChickWithThePurpleGuitar
Summary: Oneshot. Near the beginning of their world-saving sidequest, Reyna and Nico have some bonding time using Nico's never-ending supply of unicorn blood. Rated T for slight language and underage drinking. Post HoH. One-sided Percico, one-sided Jeyna.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey guys. Here's a oneshot I wrote on my phone during play rehearsal when I probably should've been doing my homework. It takes place sometime during my headcanon of Blood of Olympus while Reyna, Nico, and Coach Hedge are taking the Athena Parthenos back to Camp Half-Blood.**

**Basically, I had this image of Nico and Reyna getting really drunk and bonding over their mutual failed love lives. **

**So, I hope you like this. Warning, there's slight (very minor) language, and lots of alcohol. Also, I have yet to re-read most of HoO, so I might be mistaken about how much of Nico's backstory Reyna knows. So I apologize if some details are off (also I found out Bellona actually has a Greek form, but we're gonna ignore that).**

**Anyway, so I hope you like it. Please enjoy and review!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Also, P.S. I can't write Coach Hedge. I just barely tried. But I apologize if he's really OOC. **

Unicorn Blood

Nico stumbled as soon as they completed the jump, and Reyna fumbled to pull the ropes off his shoulders so he wouldn't pull the whole statue down on top of himself. He lowered himself to the ground, shaking slightly, and leaned against the Athena Parthenos, feeling its power vibrate against his back.

"Are you all right?" Reyna asked him, sounding paradoxically unconcerned.

Nico blinked up at her. Reyna seemed to always be at attention, as was per usual for Roman praetors. Now she stood directly over him, blocking the sun, her posture ramrod straight, one hand on her sword.

"He's fine," Coach Hedge answered for him, leaning against his baseball bat like it was a cane. "Now, listen, cupcakes. There could be monsters on us in minutes, so we better get out of here as fast as we can."

Nico slowly turned his head to tiredly stare at the satyr. "If I don't get food and sleep, we're not going anywhere." Out of the corner of his eye he thought he saw Reyna smirk, but when he glanced over, her face was impassive as ever.

The coach muttered something about going to find food for them, but Nico was too tired to listen. His eyes slowly closed, but he knew he wouldn't be able to fall asleep. Not with Reyna standing over him like that.

"So this shadow thing," she said, kneeling in front of him. Nico opened his eyes, trying not to look too annoyed. "It really takes a lot out of you?"

Nico simply nodded, too exhausted to reply. Reyna seemed to get the hint and sat back on her feet, watching him. Nico closed his eyes again.

"Is there anything I can do?"

Nico sighed but kept his eyes closed. "You could let me sleep so that we can leave before a bunch of monsters show up to kill us."

After a few minutes without Reyna answering, Nico opened his eyes just a crack. Somehow she'd moved without making noise and was now leaning against a tree next to him. With her eyes closed, she almost looked calm. Sort of like a normal person.

Nico rubbed his face tiredly, realizing he wasn't gonna get any sleep any time soon. He reached into his jacket pocket to grab a pomegranate seed, plopped it into his mouth, and then pulled out a small vial of clear liquid.

"Want some?" he asked Reyna. She opened her eyes to look over at him and immediately raised her eyebrows, though more in curiosity than surprise.

Surprise did not seem to be an emotion Reyna was capable of.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Unicorn blood," Nico replied. He took a quick swig, just to prove it wasn't poison, then offered it again.

Reyna just stared at him. "Doesn't that turn you into a zombie?"

Nico just barely raised an eyebrow. "Who do you think I am, Voldemort?" When Reyna didn't respond, he took another sip of blood. "Nah, it's like..." the strength of the drink suddenly hit him, and he coughed for a minute, swallowing hard to keep it down. Once he recovered, his voice was hoarse. "It's like Greek vodka."

Still, Reyna hesitated. "I never really pegged you as an alcohol person," she told him.

Nico sighed and put the cork back in the vial, deciding she didn't want any for now. "What do you know? We've talked, like, four times."

"Six, actually," she corrected. When Nico looked over at her, eyes wide in surprise, she quickly explained, "I record all my meetings. We've never talked otherwise."

Nico nodded slowly. "Yeah... Speaking of which... You have yet to question-"

"The fact that you're acquainted to both Greek and Roman camps?" Reyna finished for him. Nico nodded, and Reyna shrugged. "No need to ask questions. You spend so much time at Camp Jupiter, obviously you were originally taken to Percy's camp simply because it was closer."

Nico took a minute to process her theory, then cleared his throat and started fiddling with the vial's cork. "Uh..."

"Is that not true?" Reyna asked him, frowning. "Why else would you know both sides?"

"My father..." Nico began slowly. He paused to uncork the unicorn blood and take a long sip. "Gods, why am I even telling you this?"

"You brought it up," Reyna reminded him. She turned away and faced forward, gazing down the hill they'd landed on.

Nico watched her for a moment, then sighed. "My father is Hades," he said. "The _Greek_ god of the dead." Reyna narrowed her eyes suspiciously at him, but knew better than to interrupt. "Hades has never been... Shall we say, _friendly_ with the other gods. Honestly, he hates most of them- or, at least, acts like he does. Unlike most of the other gods, he also doesn't have that much of a problem with his Roman self. Switching between Hades and Pluto still gives him a headache, of course, but he doesn't ignore Pluto's existence, as some gods tend to do."

"Is this going somewhere?" Reyna asked him.

Nico glared, though not specifically at her. "Eventually, yes."

"Continue, then."

"My father trusts me, for the most part, which as you know is rare for demigods." Reyna nodded. "I spend a good majority of my time in his domain, helping out with the souls and whatnot... Anyway, one day, I walked in on him while he was Pluto, showing some Roman into Asphodel or something, I don't even know."

Nico took a deep breath. "It was unnerving, to say the least. I'm sure it's hard for you to understand, since Bellona doesn't have a Greek form, but... It's like this. It was still my dad- I mean it wasn't like I was seeing some stranger in my dad's castle or anything- but he looked... different. Younger. You know what I mean?" Reyna nodded, but it was obvious she had no idea what he was talking about.

Nico sighed and rubbed his face tiredly. "My father is the king of death," he elaborated. "But as Pluto, I saw less death and more king."

"I see," Reyna said, actually sounding like she understood.

Nico nodded. "Anyway, he had no choice but to explain everything to me. Naturally, I asked if Pluto had any children."

"And he told you about Hazel?" Reyna guessed.

Nico stared at the ground for a moment, hesitating to answer. He took a swig of unicorn blood, swallowed hard, then rasped, "Yeah, something like that. Anyway, that's when I brought her to Camp Jupiter. I figured it was easier to pretend I was Roman than give away the Greeks. So I did."

"Wow," Reyna muttered.

Nico looked over at her. She was staring ahead, her face expressionless. Nico wondered what she was thinking.

"I'll take some of that vodka now," Reyna said.

Shocked, Nico stared at her for a moment, then handed her the bottle. He tried hard not to smirk.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Nico was sprawled out on the grassy ground, staring up at the might of the Athena Parthenos.

Three empty vials of unicorn blood lay next to him, and a fourth was raised to his lips.

"Why don't you just tell Percy how you feel?" Reyna asked him from his other side, speaking slowly so as to keep from slurring.

Reyna, Nico had noticed, was a really hesitant drunk.

"You think he'd listen?" Nico laughed, taking another sip. "He's Percy freaking Jackson. He's gonna save the world, marry Annabeth, and live happily ever after. He's gonna forget about me."

Nico started to drink some more, but Reyna pried the vial out of his hand and took a swig herself. "Think how I feel," she ordered, the sage tone ruined by a hiccup afterwards. "I _had_ Jason. He _loved _me. And then he went and lost his memories and started dating that stuck-up daughter of Venus."

"Aphrodite," Nico corrected, chuckling. "At least Jason had memory loss as an excuse. Stupid Percy still _remembered_ Annabeth. I couldn't have gotten him to fall in love with me even if I'd tried."

"Ah, but you _didn't_ try," Reyna reminded him.

Nico sighed. She handed him the vial and he emptied it in one sip. "You know, Reyna? You're fun."

"You too," Reyna said. "You have more vodka, right?"

Nico chuckled and pulled another vial out of his pocket.

* * *

"Did I ever tell you about my first sister?" Nico asked a little while later. Reyna shook her head. He sighed. "She was amazing. The only mother I ever had." He chuckled. "Gods, if she saw me now she'd be _so_ mad."

Reyna looked over at him, but didn't say anything.

"She died," Nico continued somberly. "About four years ago. I used to blame Percy, but... I pushed her away. I was such an annoying little brother, she didn't want to deal with me anymore. She left for the Hunters of Artemis, and got herself killed on a quest. And then she was reborn. And now I'll never see her again."

Reyna stared at him for a moment, then decided, "You're too sad. You need more vodka, you're not drunk enough."

Nico chuckled and accepted the vial, his heart full of dread.

* * *

After another ten minutes, Coach Hedge still hadn't returned, and Reyna and Nico had gone past the stage of feeling sorry for themselves.

"Wait, wait, wait," Nico gasped, laughing as he rolled over to face Reyna. "You asked Jason to _marry_ you?"

"I _told_ him!" Reyna corrected, grinning. "And then he- he said-" she cut off, laughing louder and harder than Nico had thought possible.

If he'd been sober, he would've realized he'd never heard Reyna laugh before.

* * *

When the coach finally came back, his questmates were just barely conscious, surrounded by empty glass vials.

Coach Hedge stared, then sighed, then slammed his bat against a tree. Reyna and Nico sat up and drunkedly turned to look at him.

"All right," Hedge sighed. "Who brought the alcohol?"

Reyna immediately pointed at Nico, who grinned and shouted, "Greek vodka!"

Hedge shook his head. "Come on, cupcakes. Let's get you all sobered up."

* * *

Unfortunately, Hedge had not been able to find food edible for humans, but he _had_ discovered a stream that he promptly dumped Reyna and Nico into.

Unicom blood was not actual alcohol so that method actually worked.

Once the two demigods were sober, soaking wet, and freezing (especially Nico who had barely any body heat in the first place), Coach Hedge sat them down to give them a long talk about underage drinking.

The conversation was cut short three times- once when Reyna pushed Nico backwards into the stream, again when Nico's lips started turning blue and they had to force feed him ambrosia before he froze, and lastly when three hellhounds and a dracena showed up and tried to kill them.

But eventually, Nico had managed to shadow-travel them and the statue a few miles west, had swallowed a few more pomegranate seeds and some nectar, and was now taking a short but much-needed nap before they got moving again. Coach Hedge had tried to give the speech to just Reyna, but she wasn't hearing it.

"You don't have to lecture me," she insisted. "We realize what we did was wrong."

The coach raised an eyebrow. "Do you? Listen, cupcake, I'm not mad that you two were drinking alcohol- I was a kid once, a long, long time ago- I'm just disturbed that you were in possession of it."

Reyna shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant about the matter. "Blame the kid, he brought the vodka."

Hedge frowned and glanced over to where Nico was resting. "Yeah, I need to talk to him about that..."

"Don't," Reyna warned him. "Unicorn blood isn't actual alcohol. It messed our brains up a bit, but I remember everything we said. I learned a lot about that kid... Anyway, just leave him alone. I'll take away the vodka vials if you want, but honestly I think he needs it."

Hedge nodded. "All right. Well, let's forget about it for now. After this whole business is over-"

Suddenly, Nico sat up, staring half-awake at them. "We ready to go?" he asked tiredly.

As they strapped the statue to his back, Reyna put a hand on his shoulder. Nico forced himself not to smile.

**A/N: So, yeah, there's that. I hope you liked it. Please review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: So… people were like "hey, make this a two-shot" and I was like "what the Hades would the sequel be about?" and then I realized what the sequel would be about. So here it is. It takes place roughly five years after Blood of Olympus, so Nico and Reyna are nineteen and twenty-twoish. Hope you like this, I wrote it in present tense for no reason, please review!**

**Btw, there's some language in this, as well as more underage drinking.**

**This sequel-type-thing is dedicated to my friends C and K cause the three of us had like an hour long text conversation about topics for Reyna and Nico to drunkenly discuss, and they were very helpful.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

Nico stumbles out of the shadows, flinching as he almost falls straight into the bar. He takes a calming breath as he regains his balance, and tries to ignore the fact that his hands are shaking as he takes a seat.

"What can I get you?" the bartender asks him, sounding annoyed to have a customer ten minutes before closing.

"Anything," Nico growls. "Whatever will get me drunk fastest."

The bartender chuckles, mutters, "I know the feeling," and turns away to make the drink.

Nico runs shaking hands through his hair, then fiddles nervously with his fraying fingerless gloves. He hopes the bartender doesn't ask for his ID, because he doesn't want to deal with any more lying tonight.

Technically, Nico's only nineteen. But that doesn't mean he doesn't need a drink sometimes.

The bartender places a glass in front of Nico filled with a clear liquid Nico dares to hope is vodka.

He knocks back half the glass before realizing, with a choking splutter, that it's not vodka.

Well, not exactly, anyway.

Nico slams the glass back down on the bar as he catches his breath, demanding, "What is this?" from the bartender.

The guy shrugs. "It's new, some weird thing from Athens, I think."

"What's it _called_?" Nico growls, already expecting the answer.

The bartender checks a menu, and responds, "Unicorn blood. Weird-ass name, if you ask me."

Nico nods, but he's barely listening. _Unicorn blood..._ and the taste...

After the night he's had, Nico really doesn't want to be fucked with. But he trusts her enough to at least find out the truth.

Without paying for his drink, and not caring the least bit about it, he shadow travels away.

* * *

Nico makes it about halfway to where he wants to go before collapsing, falling out of the shadows into an empty gondola, practically turning it over in the process. He uses the shadows of the water to avoid drowning, and comes back out in a nearby alleyway, exhausted and shaking harder than ever.

He knows it's a bad idea to use any more power than he already has, but he knows he can't move far enough to find a rainbow, and after all he's been through, now is not the time to give up.

He takes a swig of nectar from his canteen (it tastes like tomato sauce, which doesn't exactly go well with the alcohol).

Still, it gives him enough energy to summon the Mist, and enough Mist for a drachma to reach through to the rainbow goddess.

"O Iris..." he prays, panting with the effort of talking out loud, "goddess of the rainbow... show me... Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano."

As the Mist shimmers and forms into the daughter of Bellona, Nico tries to clear his throat and ends up coughing uncontrollably. By the time Reyna can see him, he's sure he looks like death warmed over.

"What happened to you?" she asks, sounding worried but unconcerned in a very Reynaish way.

"Kind of a long story," Nico grunts. "And not important. Are you in Athens?"

Reyna's eyebrows knit together in what can just barely be called a frown. "At the moment, yes. How'd you know?"

Breathing suddenly hurts, so Nico takes out his nectar and tries to take a sip without spilling it all over himself. His hands are shaking so badly, he can't even get the cap open, and eventually gives up.

"Nico, where are you?" Reyna asks. "Maybe you should sit down."

Nico's already leaning against the alley wall and he's afraid if he moves, he'll fall over, so he ignores Reyna's advice. "I'm in Venice," he tells her. "Not too far from you. I think I can make the jump..."

Reyna starts to tell him not to, actual emotion starting to seep into her voice, but before she can even get a sentence out, Nico has already disappeared into the shadows.

* * *

Reyna lives in a two-bedroom apartment three blocks from the Parthenon, and her couch is small and cheap, but really comfortable.

Or maybe Nico just thinks that because he's exhausted.

"You're an idiot," Reyna says from the dining room table where she's typing something on a laptop. "You know that, right?"

"Yeah, I know," Nico groans tiredly as he lays back on the sofa. "Listen, I… I gotta talk to you…" He yawns. "But I'm gonna take a nap first."

Reyna doesn't protest (though he doubts he'd care if she did) so Nico lets himself slip into unconsciousness.

When he wakes up, Reyna's covered him with a blanket, and there's a bowl of hot soup on the floor next to his couch. Reyna's gone, but he can hear noise in the kitchen, so he assumes that's where she is.

Slowly, Nico sits up on the couch. He's significantly less tired than he was however long ago, but he still has to struggle to keep his hands from shaking (he blames the alcohol) and he still feels pain in his chest with every breath (he blames Percy Jackson).

"Are you awake?" Reyna calls from the kitchen. Nico doesn't answer, but she continues, "That soup's for you."

"Thanks," Nico says, just loud enough for her to hear him.

Reyna sticks her head into the living room. "Oh, good, you're actually awake. I was hoping I wasn't talking to a wall."

Nico chuckles and picks up the bowl of soup, glad his hands are steady enough that he doesn't spill it.

Reyna frowns at him. "Gods, what are you _wearing_?"

Nico looks down at himself, taking in the black ripped jeans, the tight black t-shirt, the hobo gloves, and the long dark cloak. He looks back up at Reyna. "I was at a wedding. I felt the need to look like Batman."

Reyna tries not to laugh, but kinda fails at it. "Yeah, I heard about that wedding. How'd it go?"

Nico rolls his eyes, no longer joking. "About as horribly as you'd think. Why didn't you come?"

Reyna shrugs. "Wasn't invited. I think Annabeth thought… you know, that I had a thing for Percy."

"So?" Nico asks. "Rachel was there. _Calypso_ was there. Heck, even I-" he cut off, looking self-consciously at the floor. "Anyway, I think you and Annabeth just never really became friends…"

"Yeah, I guess not," Reyna agrees. "Anyway, you should eat. You looked pretty bad when you called. And you're still shaking."

Nico shrugs, but starts eating his soup anyway. "I'm fine, I just had a lot of champagne at the wedding. A _lot _of champagne."

Reyna full-out laughs this time. "Aren't you still underage?"

Nico raises an eyebrow. "Reyna, I was drinking at fourteen, why would I care?"

"Unicorn blood hardly counts," she points out.

It's then that Nico remembers his reason for being there. "Right! That's what I wanted to talk to you about!" He eats another spoonful of soup, then asks, "Did you make actually alcoholic unicorn blood?!"

Reyna smiles. "Guilty as charged. Turns out if you dilute nectar, it's not harmful to humans," she explains. "Mix it with a little Russian vodka, and voila."

"But the taste," Nico says, still confused. "How did you make it taste like _actual _unicorn blood?"

Reyna sighs, as if it's a complicated explanation and she doesn't want to talk about it. But instead of denying him an answer, she just takes a seat at the table. "So you know how nectar tastes like whatever you want it to?" Nico nods. "Well, when you dilute it, you can get it to stick to one taste. It took a lot of patience, and honestly some Mist help from your sister, but eventually, I was able to make all 'unicorn bloods' taste like unicorn blood."

"That's kind of extremely awesome," Nico tells her.

Reyna smiles shyly. "Thanks. But enough about me. How have you been? I haven't seen you in, what, four years?"

"Five," Nico corrects. "I, uh, I left right after the war, remember?"

"Right," Reyna says awkwardly. "And, uh, what'd you do? Went to Venice, I assume."

Nico chuckles. "Yeah, spent a lot of time in Venice. That's, uh, that's where my mom's from, so… I found some connections, some living cousins I think, it was all very confusing and Italian."

Reyna laughs. "Don't you speak Italian?"

"Yes?" Nico says unsurely. "But that doesn't always mean I _understand _it…"

Reyna nods in understanding. "I totally get you, dude. It's the same thing with Spanish. I swear, every time Leo Valdez tries to talk to me."

"That might just be Leo, though," Nico points out.

"True," Reyna admits. "Seriously, though, Mexican Spanish and Puerto Rican Spanish are two _completely _different languages." Something beeps in the kitchen, so Reyna gets up. "Finish your soup," she orders as she goes back to the kitchen.

Nico obeys, quickly slurping up the rest of the soup. The food and sleep have helped replace the alcohol in his system, finally stilling his hands, but he knows he's not even close to being at full strength. He lays back down on the couch, thinking that maybe a few more hours of sleep will…

Reyna sticks her head out of the kitchen again, this time holding a glass bottle. "Want some?"

As Nico looks up at her holding the bottle of what he assumes is alcoholic unicorn blood, he flashes back to the first time he and Reyna shared a drink, when he held out a vial and said, "Want some?" in the same exact way she just did, completely nonchalantly, as if they couldn't care less about whether the other wanted some or not, they just wanted to get the offer out of the way so they wouldn't have to bother with it later.

Nico smiles at her and shrugs. "Sure, why not? For old times' sake."

* * *

For old times' sake, Nico and Reyna get super drunk.

Unfortunately, the demigods are no longer fighting a war, nor trapped in a heartbreaking love triangle, so they don't really have anything substantial to drunkenly talk about.

"We should be Batman and Robin," Nico muses in between swigs, as he and Reyna lay on her apartment floor. "You can be Robin, and I can be Batman."

"Noooooo, I wanna be Batman," Reyna giggles. "You're shorter, you should be Robin."

"I dunno what you're talking about," Nico slurs. "I'm like a million feet taller than you. Plus, I'm already dressed for Batman. You can put on tights and a mask and be pretty."

"Robin's not supposed to be pretty," Reyna points out.

Nico frowns. "Yeah he is. He's a Canadian superstar."

Reyna bursts out laughing. "That's a different Robin, _stupid_!"

"Nuh uh!" Nico insists, taking a moment to take another drink before continuing the argument. "Batman needs a pretty superstar or no one will take him seriously."

"No one takes _you_ seriously," Reyna counters.

"Whoa whoa whoa whoa," Nico says, rolling over so he can pat her face. "Come on, Rey, you don't gotta be _mean _about it."

They both break out into uncontrollable giggles, until Reyna pries the bottle out of Nico's hand and says, "My turn, my turn."

* * *

"You know what's awesome?" Reyna asks a few minutes later.

"Penguins?" Nico guesses.

Reyna gasps dramatically. "OMG I was totally just gonna _say _that!"

* * *

"Stop moving," Nico scolds, patting Reyna's head to keep her still.

"I'm not moving, you're moving," she insists, even as she bops her head back and forth to the rhythm of non-existent music.

Nico is attempting to braid Reyna's hair, since he technically knows how, but it's proving more difficult than he expected.

"Your hair doesn't like working," he tells her as he grabs the vodka bottle with one hand. "I'm gonna fix that." He turns the bottle upside down so that it pours out over Reyna's hair like water, making her giggle. "There, now it's better," Nico decides, and continues braiding the now wet hair.

* * *

This time around, there's no Coach Hedge to drag Nico and Reyna out of their drunken stupor. But there is Reyna's roommates, Samantha Smith and Margaret Sloan, who both enter their apartment after teaching all day just to see Reyna and some guy they've never seen lying passed out on the floor, an empty vodka bottle next to them. The guy looks like a goth hobo, and Reyna's hair is wet and badly braided, as if someone took strands of her hair and tied them in knots, then wrapped a ponytail holder around them.

Margaret and Samantha both sigh. After spending eight hours with kindergarteners and sophomores, respectively, neither of them are in the mood for dealing with their drunk roommate and her friend.

"We probably should've expected this," Margaret points out.

"Yeah," Samantha agrees. "After all, we _did _lease an apartment with a girl who makes vodka for a living."

"_Greek _vodka," Margaret corrects, as Reyna's done to them a million times.

"_Right_," Samantha laughs, rolling her eyes. "We should probably help her out."

"Already on it," Margaret says, making her way into the kitchen. She pulls two icepacks out of the freezer and throws one to Reyna and one to her friend, then opens the front door and asks Samantha, "Coffee?"

She nods, says, "Great idea," and takes Margaret's hand, leading the way out of the apartment.

* * *

Reyna wakes up with a splitting headache to find that her hair's been _styled _into a slightly damp rat's nest, there's a melted icepack forming a puddle on her shirt, and Nico di Angelo is sitting on her couch with an identical melted icepack, looking pained.

"Good news," he says softly. "I _did _leave Percy and Annabeth's wedding planning to get drunk."

Reyna chuckles. "Kinda miss the real unicorn blood, huh? At least _it _doesn't give you a hangover?"

Nico grins. "Greek vodka, huh?"

Reyna lays back down and puts her icepack on her head with a sigh. "Yeah. Greek vodka."

* * *

**A/N: So yeah there's that. I hope you all liked your sequel :D Please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Heyyyyy. So…. I know this fic…. didn't **_**really **_**need a second sequel….. But we all know it did, so here it is. Shout-out to K and C for helping me with Nico and Reyna's drunken escapades, burningmoonlight for telling me to write it in future tense (because why not, right?) and Smart Girl, because I'm sure she did something to help.**

**Also, the date of Nico's birthday is another shout-out, which is why it's kind of a random date**

**BTW, THIS TECHNICALLY TAKES PLACE AFTER BLOOD OF OLYMPUS, BUT I WROTE MOST OF IT BEFORE I'D FINISHED THE BOOK, SO SPOILERS. **

**But, like, apparently Solangelo failed or something… I don't know. It's AU.**

**Please review!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own PJO. I technically own the names of Percabeth and Jasper's children.**

* * *

When Nico turns twenty-one, the first thing he will do is drag Reyna through the shadows and get drunk off his ass with her. The only reason he knows this is because that's what he did when he turned twenty, and when he turned nineteen, and what he wishes he'd done when he turned eighteen, because that had been a tough birthday and he really doesn't like drinking alone.

But for now, he's twenty and eleven months and he cannot _wait _until April because- past experiences aside- it's gonna feel _great_ to finally drink legally.

Unfortunately, when Nico finally _does _turn twenty-one, there won't be many opportunities for inebriation. Because, and I know this for a fact, when Nico turns twenty-one, he'll be in New Rome, bored out of his mind, babysitting for Rachel and Luke Jackson-Chase.

It won't be the _worst _night he's ever had, but it'll be up there, right in between his sister dying and Albania.

What happens in Albania stays in Albania.

Anyway, April 27th will be a tough night for Nico, as he cooks traditional Italian spaghetti for his best friend's kids, but it won't be any easier for Reyna, who at that moment will be watching Frozen 3 with Tristan Grace and Thalia McLean.

Neither of them will ever be any more grateful for demigod-safe cellphones than at that moment.

_Kinda funny, huh? That Jason and Piper decided to go out the exact same night Percy and Annabeth did?_

_You're kidding, right? There's no doubt they're together. Probably with Frank and Hazel too, and Leo and Calypso. Reminiscing over the Giant War and shutting us out, as usual._

_Gods, Nico. You're getting bitter in your old age._

_Shut up._

It'll be then, with that two-word text, that Reyna will remember what day it is, and realize how much Nico must be suffering. She'll try to call him, stepping out of the TV room for a moment, but he'll be distracted with getting the pasta off the stove (and he won't want to talk to her anyway), so the call will go to voicemail.

They'll leave each other alone for the next few hours, and Nico will only call Reyna back after the kids are asleep.

"Am I the only one who's entertained by Jason and Piper's last name choice?" Reyna will choose to say instead of a standard greeting. "Like, what if they'd had Tristan first? I feel like Piper would've gotten really angsty about having a Grace and not a McLean; it was really bad planning on their part."

Nico won't answer, because he'll be eating his own dinner (he doesn't eat in front of children, it makes him paranoid), and he won't really know what to say anyway.

Reyna, who will never quite learn to appreciate silences the way Nico does, will continue talking. "I'm surprised they didn't do what Percy and Annabeth did. Although, I suppose Jackson-Chase does sound a lot better than Grace-McLean."

"I still can't believe they named their kids after their exes," Nico will mumble around his fork.

"I know, right? And you weren't one of them?" Reyna will return, shaking her head. "Unacceptable."

If asked about it, Nico will refuse to describe the sound he'll make next as a "snort" but that's what it'll be. Reyna can be kind of ridiculous sometimes (hence Albania), and Nico's always been kind of confused by the fact that she never gets on his nerves.

I suppose the alcohol helps.

"Would it be bad if we got drunk tonight?" Nico will ask later, as he's washing his dishes in Annabeth's architecturally sound sink. "Percy keeps Unicorn Blood in his fridge and I've been tempted to break it out all night."

Reyna will roll her eyes, even as she glances at the bar in Jason's rec room. "There are kids in the house, Nico. Getting drunk tonight would be the second worst idea you've ever had."

Nico won't have to ask what the worst idea he's had is. Still, he'll guess, "Albania?"

"Albania," Reyna will confirm.

"The kids are asleep," Nico will then point out, holding his phone between his cheek and his shoulder so that he can open both halves of the architecturally sound (not to mention symmetrical) fridge. "We could lock the doors, set an alarm, be awake and only _slightly _hungover by the time the parents get home."

Reyna will hesitate, because theoretically she's the responsible one, and theoretically she should be doing a better job watching Jason and Piper's kids than Nico is watching Percy and Annabeth's (because no one except maybe Hazel believed Nico would be good at babysitting, and only Hazel because she loves her brother too much not to trust him), but then she'll think about what Jason said to her before he left ("Thanks so much for this, Rey, I really owe you one. You're the best friend a guy could have,") and she'll eye the famililar Greek vodka bottle sticking out of the wine cooler, and she'll think, _To hell with it all._

"We can _drink," _she'll tell Nico, pulling out a glass from the cabinet. "But we cannot _get drunk._ Deal?"

Nico will agree, but he won't bother with a glass. It's his birthday. He'll get wasted if he wants to, sobriety obligation or not.

What Reyna does is not his concern.

* * *

Of course, they'll both get drunk anyway.

Now, you may not know this, but Nico di Angelo is rather famous among a small group of us for saying _really stupid stuff _while drunk. This time will be no exception.

"I'm thinking I should probably get a motorcycle," Nico will tell Reyna as he lies on the floor with a bottle in one hand and his phone in the other. "I'm still convinced Thalia has a motorcycle and she's just hiding it from me. I feel like I need one."

Reyna will be more controlled in her drinking, sitting at the dining room table with a half-empty wine glass, leaning on her hand with her phone on speaker in front of her. "Nico, how would you learn to drive a motorcycle? You can't even drive a car- your French zombie still has to drive you everywhere."

"I'll make it work," Nico will assure her. "I'm Batman, remember?"

Reyna will roll her eyes and say, "Nico, don't get a motorcycle. It won't end well." But then she'll pour herself another glass of vodka and all bets will be off.

* * *

"If- if- if you get a _motorcycle," _Reyna will ask later, once she's abandoned her attempts at civility and sprawled out on Jason's living room floor. "Can I... Get a _boat?"_

Nico will practically cackle at that (another verb he won't admit to) and roll over so that his phone sits beneath his chin. "No, no, no. I'll... Get a motorcycle, and you can get... Another motorcycle."

"Yeah, yeah, let's do that," Reyna will drunkenly agree. "A-and then we can... We can drive them over Percy and Jason's _faces."_

"No, no, wait, wait, wait," Nico will giggle. "Instead of that, let's take our motorcycles... And drive over Percy and Jason."

"Yeah, I like your idea better."

* * *

"Hopefully, you see where I'm going with this," Rachel concluded, leaning forward across the ping pong table. "Drunk Nico is even more of an idiot than Sober Nico."

Chiron raised an eyebrow. "I don't doubt that at all, Miss Dare. But considering this is your first bit of prophecy since the Giant War, I'm just a little confused."

Rachel sighed. "Yeah, I know, it's kinda random for a vision from Apollo. But at least it's something, right? Maybe these things come back slowly, and this is the first step."

Chiron nodded slowly. "Yes, I suppose that makes sense. All right, Miss Dare. Do whatever you have to do."

* * *

And that's how Hazel found herself at dinner with the rest of the Seven (plus Calypso), an alarm-set watch on her wrist. Apparently Rachel's visions had running timers, so Hazel knew the exact time she had to leave and go rescue her brother.

She hadn't told Frank the plan yet, but there was no doubt in her mind he'd go along with it.

Probably. He would _probably _go along with it.

Suddenly nervous about Rachel's plan, Hazel leaned closer to her fiancée, turned her head so that the others couldn't hear, and said, "Frank? Honey?"

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, they were out of the restaurant and hurrying to Frank's car.

"You couldn't have told me about this _before _we went out to dinner?" Frank complained, sounding angry even as he politely held open the passenger door for Hazel.

"I didn't want to ruin your night," she sheepishly explained.

Frank sighed, rolled his eyes, and got in the car, starting the engine as soon as he and Hazel had both buckled their seatbelts.

"Here's an idea then," Frank continued a few minutes later, once they were on the road to Percy and Annabeth's house.

Hazel groaned. "Really? You're not gonna let this go?"

"Why didn't we just tell Nico not to babysit the kids?" Frank asked, ignoring her. "Wouldn't that have been an easier way to avoid this."

"Rachel said the vision has to play out exactly as she saw it," Hazel explained. "We can only interfere after Nico and a Reyna are rolling on the floor talking about motorcycles. Which is..." She checked her watch. "Right about now."

Frank nodded. "Great. Okay then. How are we doing this?"

"I'll get Nico, you go on ahead and get Reyna?" Hazel suggested. "If we can stay with them until they sober up, they should be fine by the time the parents get home, and they won't ever have to know."

Frank glanced at her, frowning, as he turned onto Percy's street. "And... How do we know our friends won't get bored without us there and decide to come home early, only to find us with their kids, and their babysitters drunk out of their minds?"

Hazel froze, having not thought of that. Then, with a sigh, she pulled out her phone. "I have an idea."

* * *

"You better have a good reason for this, Levesque, cause I just wasted some pretty expensive fish, and I'd really rather _not _get murdered by Percy's father, so-" Leo broke off as soon as he entered the Jackson-Chases' living room. He stared for a minute or two, then glanced at Hazel, who was sitting at the table with her phone out, recording the events that were transpiring. "Hazel?" He asked her. "Is that Nico?"

Hazel nodded without looking away from her brother. "Yep."

Leo blinked. "Is he drunk?"

"At this point, I really hope so."

Nico was standing in the middle of the living room, shirtless and waving his t-shirt around like a flag, holding his phone in his other hand as he shouted nonsensically at it.

Also, he was dancing.

"Hey! Hey Reyna!" he yelled at his phone, swaying to non-existent music. "Hazel's here, and, and Leo's here, and they're gonna dance with me!"

"No, we're not," Leo protested, taking a step back. "That's definitely not happening."

"Thanks for coming over, Leo," Hazel said, putting her phone away, as Nico continued to dance. "Sorry you had to leave dinner."

"It's… fine," Leo replied distractedly, unable to take his eyes off of the son of Hades attempting to twerk. "Do I want to know what's happening right now?"

"Probably not," Hazel admitted. "I just need you to stay with the kids while I take Nico home. Did you make sure Percy and Annabeth stayed at the restaurant?"

Leo nodded, tearing his gaze from Nico to look at Hazel. "Yeah, don't worry, you're good. There's a _slight _chance Percy and Jason may end up in jail for a few hours tonight, but they won't be coming home any time soon."

Hazel blinked. "I'm not gonna ask."

"Good idea," Leo agreed. "Anyway, you deal with Nico, I'll watch the kids. Calypso's with Tristan and Thalia, too."

"Great. Thanks, Leo." Hazel got to her feet and kissed Leo on the cheek before attempting to drag her brother away from the "dance floor."

Leo smirked. He'd always wondered why Calypso refused to let him drink alcohol. This was why.

* * *

Nico woke up the day after his birthday with a pounding headache and little to no memory of the night before.

"What the hell happened last night?" he groaned, sitting up (in Hazel's bed, he noted).

"From what I can tell, we got jealous of our married ex-crushes, got plastered, talked about motorcycles, and you danced… A lot…"

Nico, unsurprised by the sudden appearance of someone else, turned to the other bed in the room (because his sister was weird and refused to share a bed with Frank until they were married), where Reyna was laying.

"We _really _need to stop drinking."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "You think?"

* * *

**A/N: THE END. LIKE, ACTUALLY. NO MORE. I PROMISE. UNLESS YOU GIVE ME A PROMPT FOR ONE, in which case I will totally right more. :D *innocent grin* PLEASE REVIEW.**


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